Sunday, October 19, 2008

Best Day Ever.

Around our house, there's an understanding. If I'm hungry and the food item is in any kind of packaging, said box/bag will end up looking like wolves drug it into the house. I just don't have the patience or talent to open things so that they can be re-closed. I'm hungry, dammit.

Mr. Zoom will often sprint towards anything I've indicated an interest in so that he can open it like a civilized person would. I'm not allowed to open chip bags when we are having people over.

That's why when I opened our trash bin and saw this:

I took it out and photographed the evidence. I don't eat ice cream (not because I don't want to), so that left only one other person in our house.

I ran into the room where Mr. Zoom was. "PLEASE tell me that the cut in two strawberry ice cream container in the trash is your work, that you did that so you could get to it faster?"

"Yes."

I ran away squealing with what he now calls "happy feet."

In other news, we Zooms have now discovered that is it actually possible to be locked inside one's car without the ability to override the auto-locks.

Every night when we leave the office, Mr. Zoom and I put our work stuff in the trunk of the car. I usually put my purse back there too. The ride home is usually about 10 minutes at the most, and it saves me stepping all over it because I've put it on the car floor.

This particular evening we stopped at the store on the way home. I didn't need anything and decided to wait in the car. He got out, got his wallet out of the trunk, walked away and clicked his fob to lock the car. I didn't thin a thing about it.

About 10 minutes later I wanted a little air. Since there was no key, I knew the window would not work. So I tried the door. Nothing. Tried to unlock the door. Nothing. Tried to unlock the driver's side door. Nothing. Looked for a kid safe lock master override or ANYTHING. Nothing.

No cell phone, no purse, no nothing. Holy shit, I'm LOCKED IN A CAR AND CAN'T GET OUT. I'm claustrophobic and unreasonable, too.

I began hitting the horn, trying to get any one's attention. Sure, I got plenty of attention but not one person would approach the car. You know the term window licker? Yeah, I had hands and face pressed up against the window in what I can only imagine was an Oscar winning performance of lunatic face. I wanted to see if I could get someone to go find Mr. Zoom and let him know I was trapped. Turns out I looked more like I wanted to eat brains.

I spent a while with the window, feeling the panic. Shortly after that, Mr. Zoom did emerge from the store. We were both just kind of standing there wondering what just happened.

All is well and now I laugh at it. And hey, now I know how NOT to obtain help in the future, right?

2 comments:

fatherjack said...

I guess cutting it open is a measured way of getting into it. If the opening was left with teeth marks around it then THAT would be desperate.

joeschmitt said...

You are just as funny at 1000 words as you are at 140 characters.