Saturday, November 04, 2006


We Zooms are never ones for celebrating birthdays, anniversaries, Valentines day... I can't possibly keep everyone's dates straight, even with modern technology. I'm too flaky to stick to one technological device - so there's endless incomplete information in about 30 places at one time.

That translates to me forgetting just about everyone's day. I like to give anything I find for someone right away instead of waiting for a special day anyway. Part of that is because I simply can't hold on to something I've found for someone for very long. I feel like I will explode if I don't get it to them right away.

Today is our official first wedding anniversary. And I guarantee you that I wouldn't even have known to write happy anniversary to Mr. Zoom in any kind of big deal way - except for my parents. Those who birthed me are quite insane. I've already apologized to Mr. Zoom.

He came home one night while I was at the gym and this is what I heard on my cell phone: "Um...there are large....LARGE packages here at the house. Only they aren't packages... really. They are trash bags. But it doesn't appear to be trash. I think it might be something from your parents."

Indeed, it was.

It came with a card explaining that this is our one year anniversary, which means paper.

And we will be using all of it. Although both of us are a tad disturbed at the Nesting Boxes. They are Christmas themed, and for some reason scare us as a clown doll would if it were sitting in our house staring at us.

"Are we a household or an institution? My guess is both."

My FAMom also provide me with a bag of leftover Halloween candy. I was amused and afraid for her when I got it home and realized she had made individual baggies of candy for her visitors:

Witness two bags she prepared. Each has exactly the identical contents. She's not about to let any little greedy child try and fool her into thinking they deserve a second helping - since all of her offerings are full of thought and fairness. Fairness you CAN.NOT.ARGUE. I love my mom, but she's always looking at a situation as having a potential problem attached to it. And she loves nothing more than beating you to the solution to it. Whether a real problem exists or not.

When I came home with these I told Mr. Zoom "Uh, you want to take this to the office with you? Warning though, my mom individually baggieized the candy."

Now, where am I going to store 30 rolls of toilet paper?


Rev. Brandy said...


I love how you manage to capture the hilarity/insanity of the fam in photos. It's so priceless.

Spin_Doc1 said...

Wow, that is a lot of paper! And your mother is very thoughtful (a little scary too).

AndyT13 said...

Happy happy happy happy happy happy happy happy anniversary!
I can't believe I knew you before you were Mr. And Mrs. Zoom!
Conratulationitudes! It's nice to know I'm not the only one with completely insane parental units.

Aisha T. said...

Oh my gosh! Your parents are absolutely hysterical.
Oh, happy anniversary to the zooms right away!

theresa said...

Completely, beautifully, loveably INSANE!

Unacknowledged Genius said...

Happy Anniversary! It looks like you've got a supply of paper products to last until your next anniversary.