There's a girl at the office who I've formed a friendship with. Sometimes C and I hang out with her during non-work hours. We will call her Mom of Joey, or MOJ.
She tells us stories about her son that have C and I laughing and telling MOJ to give him a high five from us when she gets home that night.
Last night about 12:30 a.m., MOJ woke to find Joey standing in her room asking for a sandwich. When MOJ said "no honey, go back to bed", she thought that was the end of it. Instead, she wakes up a few minutes later with Joey smaking her arm with a package of lunch meat from the refrigerator, and he's saying "This one mommy".
So she gets up and makes him a sandwich. After he's done, he says "Well now I need ice cream, of course" as if it is just natural.
This kid is only 4 years old. Being that C and I know nothing about kids, these little stories of Joey may be nothing unusual. By the way, C calls him Joey because of the sandwich story and C's love of the Joey character on Friends.
The first story I got about Joey was this one: He goes to a Christian Pre-School. One day his grandma was taking him to class, and he started acting up. When the teacher told him that the bible wants little children to be good, he said "The bible lies."
...just like that.
MOJ says that he's not getting it [the bible talk] from her, and the only people who watch him while she's at work are her family. ...or, the kid has an astounding sense of comedy timing and dark humor. It's a mystery for everyone right now.
The second story I got about him was that one night his grandma asked him to say his prayers before bed. He didn't want to. His grandma told him that prayer was a chance to "ask for things you want." Joey said "Dear Jesus, I want a new batmobile." Then he opened his eyes and said "See Grandma? Jesus doesn't work."
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2 comments:
Kids are the best humor EVER. How funny is that?
My friends, Elvis and Priscilla, have a (now) 6-year-old named Calvin. Calvin is, as his nickname would indicate, too smart for his own age, a devoted animal lover, and an effective mischief-maker with a killer imagination.
Calvin is also, strangely enough, one of the most considerate, giving and sensitive boys I have ever met. He always thinks about how other people feel, and he literally gives away his toys, clothes and anything else his playmates might mention they like. Very sweet boy.
One day around Christmas, 'Scilla was in the store with Calvin, and Calvin tugged on her sleeve, announcing that he wanted to buy a present for Jesus. After all, it is his birthday.
I'm sure Jesus is very grateful for the little children who either "try him" and find he "doesn't work" . . . or are busy thinking about what Jesus would like for his birthday. Most adults merely spend their days using his name as a way to indicate their disgust with fellow commuters or their short-bus coworkers.
Thank god there are another generation of smart assses in the world - I figure god has to have a sense of humor, how else can you explain duck billed platapus. At least I'm gambling he appreciates my humor
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