Saturday, March 22, 2008

But I Don't Want the Version for the Flibbity Flam 490 Platform. Thingie.

Mr. Zoom has been super busy at the office. They have been working on a huge tech project, so by the 3rd day of not sharing a car to work with him to and from the office, I became a little determined to bring his attentions back around to me. Plus, I knew he wanted a particular video game and would not have had a chance to purchase it on his own yet.

I left the office last night and went to Best Buy. Mr. Zoom wants Rainbow Six Vegas, 2. It was supposed to have come out this week. So I thought I had this little chore totally locked up as a simple stop on my way to the grocery store for more instant oatmeal. I went in and knowing I have no clue where to obtain a video game for the PC (except at Target. I totally know where they are in there), I went to a clerk to ask for help. He said "Oh, I don't think that's out yet. Let's go see the computer."

He clickity clicked around and said "No, that won't be out about a week from now. March 26." I said "Oh, ok. Thanks anyway." But he kept going: "The street date for the PC got pushed back for a month, so it's not coming out until April sometime. But the version for the 340/690/playstation/my grandma's turntable is here. Do you want that one?"

Street date? What? Who? All I know is the words that were fed to me by Mr. Zoom. "RAINBOW SIX, VEGAS, 2 FOR P.C." Going outside the lines in this instance would not be a good idea. And isn't April a lot later than what he had just told me? Because this whole spiel sounded suspiciously like a mathtacular word problem, I just said "no thanks" and slinked away to the DVD section. Totally defeated. NOW what was I going to buy for Mr. Zoom? I knew there were at least two more games on the list he had given the family for ideas from his last birthday, but like a typical Zoom I left that in the car.

Then I saw a copy of "Eagle v. Shark". One copy. I've been looking to buy this movie since I caught it on On Demand. They've always been out of it, and now here's a copy with my name practically written on it - begging me to buy it. So I did. Oh, and I also happened to attract a copy of "Into the Wild", which I haven't seen but did read the book. I'm such a fantastic wife. I go to the store to buy a present for Mr. Zoom and come out with none for him - TWO for me!!

I got into the truck and realized I had Mr. Zoom's list of other games wanted. BUT, I couldn't go back in the Best Buy, because I had just been in there and the language they spoke I did not understand. So I needed another store. Luckily there's a Circuit City just across the street from this particular Best Buy. So I drove like a typical girl over there (I took out a curb on my way) and readied myself for a second attack on Operation Gift for Mr. Zoom.

I went inside and tried to find a clerk. There were two of them having a rather heated debate about cinnamon breath mints and a slammin party for the evening. I asked the one who decided to break from the discussion first to help me out. He couldn't find any of the games I needed on the list, so we went to the computer for more information. "Jibber, I don't have those two games you need for PC. OH, wait, I have a Hit Man Trilogy, which has the two games you want, plus another one." I said "OH, great. I'll take that then."

His response? "OH, no wait. We don't have it here." Of course they didn't.

This clerk tried to uber sell me some other versions and some other games, and I just kept backing away from him saying "nothankyou, nothankyou ...thanks for looking it all up, but really, nothankyou." I backed into the Nintendo DS games, and when I turned around to browse, I found the pictograph game I've been jonesing for - for like a month. My brother-in-law had told me about it and offered to let me borrow his wife's pictograph chip. I declined, because look at my life. Does anyone think I could borrow something from someone and not have it accidentally go down the toilet or something? And these days, things are discontinued about 10 minutes after they hits the store for the first time. So it's not easy to replace stuff. So when I saw pictograph, I made an actual little jump for joy and took it to the register. And bought it.

If anyone is keeping count, that's 3 PRESENTS for me, and 0 for MR. ZOOM.

Next I drove to an alternative Best Buy. Because dammit, I was going to buy Mr. Zoom a game he wanted no matter what. Inside the alternative Best Buy I had the exact same luck. Zilch. I avoided speaking to any clerks - because in my mind - I might have to come back here AGAIN tonight, and I didn't want to burn another electronics store option. I searched the games until I found something that I hoped Mr. Zoom would like. Even if it wasn't on his list. Which is the biggest, fattest chance you ever saw. I chose something that looked like it might work. I then browsed the DVD racks, because I thought I had heard him mention that he wanted "I am Legend" on DVD.

There was a huge display of that movie, right in front of me. I skipped over to it, figuring I had finally won a nod from the luck department. Not so fast, apparently. Can anyone tell me why a DVD now has to come out in 8 thousand flavors? Why there has to be the one with a t-shirt wrapped around it, one with a metal cover, one with a cardboard cover, one with "never before scenes", one with "alternative ending", the "collectors version special edition", one in wide screen, one in sucker buy non-wide screen, one for dvd players owned by ferrets; and then don't even get me started on the versions for game consoles. Of which there are another 600 versions. All this does is guarantee I will buy the entirely wrong version for Mr. Zoom.

Knowing this, I decided to buy the most elaborate and ridiculous version of the dvd I could find. I bought the one that comes in a metal container. And I think it has the alternative ending. Or something. Hell, I don't even know if we own the proper player to play it at this point.

FINALLY, I had gift(s) for Mr. Zoom. Although I knew they were merely representations of my efforts, and possibly things he was going to have to return. So I went home and told Mr. Zoom about my day.

And then I realized I totally forgot to stop at the grocery store for the Oatmeal. HOORAY!!

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