Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Cruising the Icebergs of Family Crazy

My brother and his girlfriend came around for dinner with my parents. Mr. Zoom and I were invited, but Mr. Zoom couldn't go. I ended up agreeing to face the House of Retired Crazy on my own. And you know what? Some magical things happened.

As it is with every family, the same stories came out in almost identical order to every other family gathering. But this time there was a change. My Dad began to tell the story of how Mr. Zoom had asked for his blessing before proposing to me. I knew 90% of the story already, but there was a backside that I did not know.

My Dad was enrolled in cooking classes - he always is - and Mr. Zoom had arranged a dinner for the parents on one of his class nights. Dad gathered the class and let them know why he couldn't be at the next meeting. Upon returning to the class the next week, he told the story of why he had to miss the previous class. He was so relieved that his daughter finally got a marriage proposal at all, AND that it was from someone who obviously cared about doing something respectful. He wanted to share it with his class. He further added that two rather "rough and tattooed" gentlemen in his class later came up to him and said "We are happy for you, because that is absolutely the way it SHOULD be done. The ONLY way." Dare I say Dad felt like a hommie after that.

The most fantastic part about watching Dad tell the story and learning the new information was seeing how very much he honestly adored the fact that Mr. Zoom did that.

I also learned that my brother's girlfriend's dog literally threw up dog food the very first time he came over to her house. He said he's actually shocked that Miss K went on a second date, knowing that most women will heed the warning of a pet over almost anything else. Especially one who has yacked dog food all over the living room upon the initial meeting. The Dog is now attached to my brother's side whenever he can be. No more yacking.

This next discovered fact might give us all a glimpse into why Miss K gave him another chance. Apparently when she was a kid and was served fried chicken, she would try and put the chicken back together on her plate. She was raised on a farm and I guess this activity freaked out her brothers and sisters.

The not so magical also happened. My Mom got a ticket for blocking the sidewalk with vehicles from their driveway. She concluded that "someone from the street called the police and tattled on her." Because everyone knows that police don't patrol randomly on their own or anything. *SIGH*. Mom now has another "warning" to add to her daisy chain of paranoid like disclaimers for visitors: "Watch out for the children". "Don't park there on street cleaning day." "Do you have $150 spare dollars? Because that's how much a ticket is going to cost you if you have blocked the sidewalk."

She had everyone doing the car shuffle even further into the driveway, even though we were all very much clear of the sidewalk in the first place. I swear I saw her wave her hands in restrained victory after the car engines were silenced.

And my parents got dinner on the table the typical 2 hours later than projected. But it was still good.

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