Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Chuckey. Coming to a Table Near Me.

Why is it that my parents can pull the term Turducken out of the air and talk about it as if it is a ubiquitous main dish...

...yet I can't get them to research snopes about those ridiculous internet forwards they keep reading. And forwarding. And talking about in mixed company.

Definition of Turducken from Wikipedia:

A Turducken is a dish consisting of a partially de-boned turkey stuffed with a de-boned duck, which itself is stuffed with a small de-boned chicken. The name is a portmanteau of those ingredients: turkey, duck, and chicken. The cavity of the chicken and the rest of the gaps are filled with, at the very least, a highly seasoned breadcrumb mixture or sausage meat, although some versions have a different stuffing for each bird. Some recipes call for the turkey to be stuffed with a chicken which is then stuffed with a duckling. It is also called a chuckey.


I had never heard of a Turducken or Chuckey [I'll be calling it a Chuckey] before speaking to my very own mother today on the telephone. I had to look it up on the internet. Seeing as it is cooking, I guess I shouldn't be surprised. But when she said Turducken, I honestly thought her tremor was preventing her from speaking clearly.

I'm not sure how I feel about this particular food item. I will be facing it in the future at a family gathering. I think I was ok until I read "...stuffed with a chicken which is then stuffed with a duckling." I am the first to admit that squeam inducing food is more psychological for me than anything else. I once couldn't finish a stew I found out was made out of bunny. And only because I found out it was made out of bunny. So ... duckling? I really don't think I'll be able to get that down either. Although it's not certain that the one I'll be facing is going to have duckling rather than duck.

I can't help it. Bunnies and baby ducks are critters I just can't eat. If I were starving, yes. I'm sure I'd eat them at the speed I reserve for chocolate cake - but for just regular eats? No. It doesn't make any sense. I'm fine with eating cow, full grown chicken or even chicken eggs! But you say duckling and I'm out. I'd rather eat one of Dad's other experiments - even if it has peas in it.

Maybe it is the fact that I don't cook, but I really don't see the appeal of making my dinner into a set of Russian nesting dolls.

Also, this thing has got to be one dense mo fo for the purposes of cooking all the way through. Traditionally, my parents can't get a dinner on the table within 2 hours of the projected time because something went wrong. Doesn't a regular turkey take like 12 hours to cook as it is? I'm going to have to sneak in bags of chips to keep this dinner party from becoming the Donner party. I'll have to make up reasons to have people meet me outside for a handful so Mom doesn't think we are ruining our appetites for dinner.

Sometimes I really wish they would just order one of those 300 foot party sandwiches from some shop and call it a day.


Keyser Soze said...

Dinner party=Donner Party?

HAHAHAHAH! You never fail to amuse dear Zoom!

BostonPobble said...

I really enjoy turkey. I really enjoy duck (not duckling ~ I feel the same way about duckling ~ but duck.) I really enjoy chicken.

Turducken makes me nervous.