Tuesday, December 06, 2005

Weekend: History Channeling at The Christmas Party / Fear Factor Dinner With Friends

I am forever fascinated with religion. Having no association with any specific religion of my own, I love learning about all of them.

Last week sometime I watched a show on the History Channel about the *woo woo* forbidden or rejected books of the Bible.

Saturday, Mr. Zoom and I accompanied two of our friends to their office Christmas party. And I should probably call it a Holiday Party, but the thing is, I just don't care what it's called. Christmas it is. Hold on, the connection is coming...

Towards the end of the evening, the dessert was being served. Mr. Zoom, the knower of knowing things immediately identified the goo as Cherries Jubilee.

This caused me to say to him with authority: "JUBILEES! The discarded book of the Bible!!" He gave me the look. I said "I shlaw it on de History Channell! Jubilees ish one ov thosh books they illishimated from sha final version of sha Bible!" He understands my drunk dialect. I'm so lucky!

He gave me the "ooooooh, all clear" nod and said "That was going to be so much more impressive when I thought you made it up and were just talking out of your butt."

Sunday we were at another friend's home for a little Christmas open house type thing. We were partaking of stew and sandwiches, and all of the cookies and brownies I could get my hands on.

During the stew part of the meal, one of our other friends was commenting on how it needed some spice. Mr. Zoom and he were talking back and forth when the following words slapped me upside the head: "Rabbit Stew".

That's when I realized that what I thought had been chicken, was actually rabbit stew. Rabbit = Bunny. Bunny stew.

I had only gotten a few spoonfuls in at this point. I then had an inner fight with myself:

"Just eat it. You were eating it 3 seconds ago and it was fine when you thought it was chicken. Come on. Nothing has changed. What is wrong with you? Other people around you are eating it and they are fine. Don't be an ungrateful guest. EAT IT. You eat beef. You eat chicken. You eat shrimp and sometimes weird sushi rolls. Why is this such an issue for you?"

But I couldn't. I tried, but it wasn't going to happen. Mr. Zoom noticed I couldn't get it down and without even having to ask, knew it was the cooked bunny revelation that had quashed my appetite.

The mind is a serious enemy when you least expect it. Especially when most of the time it appears you've lost it.


Rev. Brandy said...

Piggy-backing on the bunny thing:

I bought one of those so-cool-it-hurts scarves last winter that are bunny fur (bunny balls, actually) dyed that really popular leaf-green color that everyone was wearing. At first, it made me sick to realize I was wearing dried up (dyed green) bunny draped fashionably around my shoulders. Then I started thinking about all the animal I not only eat but wear and smear on my face all the time, and I was REALLY disgusted with myself.

I am pretty sure that at this point, I am revealing some kind of weird glimpse into my brain that no one wants or needs, but here goes anyway:

When I get REALLY grossed out being carnivorous (with which I struggle, all the time), I imagine that my breath smells like what the T-Rex's breath must have smelled like in "Jurassic Park" when he has finished eating the lawyer and it's sniffing around Sam Neill and the hysterical children. Dead animals, hanging from teeth.

Okay, that's enough violence for one morning.

AndyT13 said...

Apocryphal/missing books from the bible...I love the history & discovery channels!

Rabbit stew...OK, I can't help it. E-yew! I'm usually not squeamish about such things and I'd certainly eat just about anything if I was hungry enough but...E-yew!

The mind is a terrible thing to taste. Waste it. Glad you['re enjoying my book. :-)

Aisha T. said...

Mr. Zooom is *insert Strangers With Candy voice* HIIILLAAAAAARIOUS. Cherries Jubilee. Never had the oppurtunity to try. And the Rabbit stew thing. That will happen. I had fed goats in India everyday and was then informed they were our dinner at the upcoming banquet. *shudder* couldn't eat it. I actually like to eat goat though. Just not one I've cared for and petted for about 2weeks. My ex-boyfriend had pounded down half a pan of goat biriyani that my mother had made (she's an amazing cook) and then asked. He looked green as he informed me he doesn't eat goat.

theresa said...

I'm a weird, almost-vegetarian. I eat seafood and fish because they aren't even remotely pet-like to me. The idea of eating bunny-stew is like eating my dog. I had bunnies as pets when I was a kid. My question is, how did everyone else at the party keep from hurling? Are you the only normal person in California?

ZooooM said...

Rev, I started to have one of those domino effect sessions too. Trying to figure out why it's ok to wear/eat one thing, but suddenly not the cute little bunny.

Andy, I think we'd all eat anything if we were trying to survive. And I can go a while withoug having to eat. he he.

Aisha, see - now I wonder if I should ask what's in things before I hoover them down. I totally assumed it was chicken.

T, I don't know that everyone there knew. I do know that out of the 3 other people around me that were eating it - at least two of them said "I've eaten things in Paraguay, so I'm not afraid of weird food."

I am far from any normal - much less here in the CA. But my boobs are real, so I've got that going for me. =)

AndyT13 said...

I hates me them fake 'uns something awful.