Wednesday, March 22, 2006

It's Like I'm Frustrated and Angry

So last week sometime, my cell phone went missing. At first I assumed I misplaced it in the house (I lose EVERYTHING I touch). After tearing home/work/car and places I've never been to apart, we checked on the internet to see if the account showed useage - that obviously wasn't mine.

It did. Someone had the phone and was burning up the keypad sending text messages with it. I was peeved, but realized there's no way anyone but me is going to care enough to actually try and figure out who had it. The phone company can't be bothered and I'd not expect police to waste their time with that. So we canceled the phone and I got a new one.

And the worst thing about it is, there's this little place in my gut that holds on to the anger I get over stuff like this. I can't see those silly "kids texting" commercials without a Nam Flashback of the realization "SOMEONE HAS MY PHONE! and they aren't afraid to use it."

This experience went directly on top of an older stolen cell phone experience. After receiving a cell bill with the telephone calls of someone who had stolen my phone, I spent an evening calling those numbers. When someone would pick up, I would say "Someone stole my phone and used it to call you. TELL ME WHO IT WAS." Most people just hung up on me, and I spent my time re-calling them over and over.

Absolutely useless, but for some reason I felt a teeny bit better because I was able to get that much closer to whoever did it.

If the text message telephone numbers show up on our bill, I'll do the same thing again.

See how retarded I am?

So today I get an e-mail from Mr. Zoom. Turns out that someone got a hold of a bit of financial info of ours and went shopping with it.

...they bought Juno internet service with it.

Yup. $6.95 worth of damage actual damage, and incalculable actual cost in astonishment, frustration and anger. Mr. Zoom had to file a police report, and we had to get everything canceled and reissued.

Not that I want to be robbed of more than $7.00 actual dollars... but what kind of rocket scientist master criminal buys JUNO INTERNET SERVICE with stolen information?

I didn't even know Juno still existed. From the price, I'm guessing they signed up for dial-up. By the time we found the charge, they couldn't have had time to even download one e-mail using dial up. Maybe they bought more stuff, but none of it will be clearing the account now.

Whoever you are, why don't you go pull change out of water fountains? You will probably make more than $7.00 a shot and I won't be forced to sit around trying to think of ways to find you. And run you over with my truck.

WWCND? = What would Chuck Norris do?


theresa said...

If you had to get robbed, I'm glad it was by someone so unambitious. It's obviously annoying, but not too damaging.

I'm on the edge of my seat waiting to hear about the folks you get to chat with on the phone.

Al said...

At least they didn't buy massive amounts of embaressing phone porn

ZooooM said...

T - UNAMBITIOUS! That's the damn word I was searching for, but in my hissy fit could not come up with. See? You are the perfect being.

Al, I'd have had a ton more respect for someone purchasing porn. I can understand the need for porn. Not so much the dial up.

Polyman2 said...

I had an employee that used my CC
to call the sex lines...what an jerk.
Good luck and kick the bastards ass.

Ka said...

Well... as to WWCND,

Chuck Norris puts the 'laughter' in 'manslaughter'

so I'm sure he could handle the situation for you...

The Management said...

Anger good... Frustration bad...

Dedicate your life to tracking down these fools and pound them within an inch of their lives. Use blunt, but heavy objects, like cast iron bath tubs or VW Beetles(you could use force saving simple machines like pulleys or inclined planes).

You're right though it's not the text messages or seven dollars, the real crime here is the loss of your sense of justice and security.

I would take the numbers that your phone text messeged and spam the crap out of them, day in and day out. Post them on news groups...

"Free Sexy Ringers Hardcore XXX Pics straight to your Phone, just messege 'tool' at 123-123-1234"

As for the Juno... The guy has to dail in from a land line, I would bitch to Juno and then the freaking cops.. yeah they have something better to do, but credit card fraud is a better use of there time than going into bars and arresting me... achemm... Drunks.


ZooooM said...

Polyman, thanks. In between kicks I'll say "and Polyman hates you too!"

Ka, I knew you'd know wcnwd.

Otter, when I saw that bar arrest story, I immediately thought of you. You can do the angry so much better than I can. I just spew nonsenical words. You write the funny, but meaningful.

And ooooh, I didn't think of spamming with those numbers! YAY! More evil!

AndyT13 said...

Yes, absolutely spam those numbers like mad. The person who stole your phone will then be on teh shit list of everyone he texted.
And yes, it should be easy for Juno to track down the theif. Dumbass criminals. I'd be all out buying me a hummer. No, not the car silly, I...nevermind.

theresa said...

I am "ONE" with the word ... especially THAT word.