Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Dave Matthews Fans - Look Away.

Dave Matthews' voice annoys me. I'm sorry. I don't hear what the rest of you seem to hear. And love.

I will say the tunes are agreeable, and even Mr. Zoom is a fan of him/them. But, when the DM starts to sing I involuntarily siezure with teeth gritting and eye squinting. Stone me if you must.

Tonight after dinner Mr. Zoom and I got into the car to drive home when I remembered that a co-worker of his had told him to keep a specific weekend open this month. That particular weekend happened to be one we had already committed to do something, so Mr. Zoom had to turn him down.

I hadn't remembered to ask at the time what they were trying to plan, so I brought it up in the car.

"What was it that The Pilot wanted you to do on that weekend?"

"Oh, go see Dave Matthews."

"Oh, I hate him [DM]. Too bad. You could have totally gone to that if we didn't already have that other thing we said we'd go to."

"Yes, I know this. So does The Pilot. That's why he was trying to arrange it."

Right then, Mr. Zoom killed a very noisey clown. Normally these incidents pass with negligible odor. This time, however, windows were suddenly rolled down and Mr. Zoom made a noise that indicated doom was now a passenger in our car.

It took about 2 seconds for me to realize just how smelly our passenger was. I sqeaked "DRIVE AWAY DRIVE AWAY - hurry! before the car engine lights it on fire!" I had the passenger door open, hoping to draw in some slightly less polluted air. He drove and circulation finally relieved us of our unwanted passenger.

I don't know if my eyes were watering from laughing or from the burn of one very dead clown.

I turned to Mr. Zoom and said "You know, it's funny how we were talking about Dave Matthews when that smell came out of your butt."

4 comments:

The Idiot said...

My wife, ladies and gentlemen.

The 7:30 show is much better than the 5:00. Please tip your waitress.

"You know, not everything is an anecdote. You have to discriminate!"

Unacknowledged Genius said...

killed a clown, hahahaha. never heard that but i will use it.

i used to like DM but now all their songs sound alike.

AndyT13 said...

Dave Matthews, dead clowns...meh. Same thing.

Al said...

Zoomer -
Did it smell like "when the world ends"....