Sunday, April 10, 2005

Etched Message in the Ring

The last week or so, I've been trying to organize my vinyl records in some kind of comprehensive list so I can sell them. It's been years since I've owned a turn table, and I'm never going to find a good safe spot for all 200+ of them. In short, they are more of a nuisance than a joy anymore. I'm hoping to get some money to offset the cost of our upcomming wedding with them.

I've kept a few, some that I just can't bear to part with. I actually like having just a precious few around, even if I never play them again.

Something I had forgotten about vinyl records was the little messages the band would sometimes press into the inner ring. When I was younger, I would play the records while inspecting the liner notes, inner picture sleeves and covers. I remember finding the little messages on some of the vinyl and thinking how cool that was.

While I was listing some of my records today, I remembered those messages. Here they are:

Not That loud!
I’ve been looking for a guide.

Fight the real enemy - not each other.
Watch out for AME BIX/instigators - Simon Gainey

Hello Mum!
Hello Dad.

The royalties are in the post.
Hello boys. Love Bilbo and Stone 7.5.88

I won!
Jack is comedy.

Tampons are taxed as a luxury item.

Help! I’ve been porkified - and just in the Nik O’ Time.
I do like to bim beside the bimside. Oinky Oink.

Time’s running out.
It’s wicked.

Dirt in the works.
Mothered to death.

The pink stabber!
Use the all over condom NOW!

Porky says "Happy Christmas".
What’s your excuse?

Keep a candle burning.

Empty the sky into your pocket.

See ya at the tube bar.
Rik karen Mt. Agnew 4 ever.

Smells like shit.
Bend over Beethoven

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