Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Ever See the Movie Beastmaster?

Originally uploaded by ivegotzooms.
I used to be able to update this from my office, but the anti-time wasting filter has caught up with me. I now have to resort to using the "blog this" feature on Flikr. I'm sure it is only a matter of time before that too, is blocked.

As luck would have it, I needed a visual for this entry anyway.

I'm in the office loo this morning, and it is unusually crowded. There's no delicate, lady like way to explain happenings in the loo, so I'm just going to get on with it.

I'm getting myself a butt gasket and making the necessary adjustments, when I notice my neighbor's foot positioned perfectly so that the tattoo she has on her foot is looking RIGHT AT ME from the next stall over. I've never even been able to see the feet of neighbors in the loo before.

And when I say her foot was looking at me, I mean LOOKING. It's the image here, an Egyptian eye thingie. She has it on the top part near her pinkie toe. Her shoes make it so that the eye is perfectly free to freak me out.

I can barely pee when other people are in the bathroom with me, let alone pee when someone's foot eye is looking right at me!

Back in the 80s my parents got cable for the first time. They had some movie channel, and it ran "Beastmaster" about 4,562 times in one month. And then it did that again for the next 3 consecutive years.

There's an evil ring in the movie with an eyeball or something...it can see stuff. It was as if I was transported back in time to sitting in front of the family t.v., and I was watching the Egyptian version of the Beastmaster...only it was set in my office loo, I was IN the movie, the ring was now a tattoo, and I REALLY needed to pee after a large cup of coffee. I became the Peemaster, and I was doing a really lousy job of it.

I don't need eyes, evil or otherwise in the loo with me - ever. Even my own eyes would blind themselves if they could.


Al said...

LOL - I walked in the one of the company bathrooms once and heard a guy singing "There's a place for us.." in one of the stalls. I decided to pee in one of the other bathrooms

AndyT13 said...

A former lover (and still friend) had that tattooed on the back of her neck when she became a mother so she could tell her kids she has an eye in the back of her head. According to her it works like a charm LOL

ZooooM said...

al, were you in the ladies room? Who sings at the office loo?

Andy, as someone with night terrors as it is, I can say that sleeping with someone having an eyeball tattooed on the back of their neck would probably freak me out. It would give good story, but still would freak me out.

theresa said...

The PeeMaster! You totally crack me up! Life with you is either a fright-fest or a laugh-fest.

Al - OMG! I can't wait to go to work tomorrow and try that. I think it loses a bit in the ladies room, but still ... very, very funny. .... hmmmm, how much trouble would I get into if I snuck in some AV equipment? Workplace loo? Probably a lot, huh?

Rev. Brandy said...

I tried so hard to find a photo of the Eye of Braxus to link to from this comment, but I couldn't . . . mabye you need "The Beastmaster" DVD as a wedding present . . . I understand the Eye of Braxus is one of the menu buttons . . .