Thursday, September 08, 2005

Zoom's Scary Movie Gear


The other day I saw an ad for the new poop your pants scary looking movie "Emily Rose" or whatever the exact title is. I won't even look it up on google, because I'm terrified I'll come across the official website for the film and I won't have a chance to do laundry before Saturday.

That movie looks absolutely terrifying, yet I MUST see it. I still can't watch "The Shining" or "The Exorcist" alone, at night. I can barely watch them alone on a bright sunny day. Yet, I insist on watching these things.

When I first saw the previews for "The Grudge" and "White Noise", I literally screamed "Fuck You, scary movie!"... at the movie screen, through my scarf. We were at our local go go plex and I can't remember what movie we had gone to see. Now that I've seen both of those movies, I laugh at my initial reaction. They have their moments, but they aren't the kind of movies that give me the wibblies so bad that I have to sleep with a light on that night.

This "Emily Rose" thing though...seems like it might be. And laugh at me if you must, but "The Ring" did a number on me as well. I wasn't living with C at the time. I lived alone, and I had a t.v. in my bedroom that, until then, I had used to lull me to sleep on restless nights. That night I turned the t.v. around, and it stayed that way for a while.

So yeah, that whole couch jawa thing up there is how I watch a scary movie. Head and face MUST be covered, preferably only glasses are exposed. Sometimes nose coverage causes my glasses to fog up, so adjustments have to be made periodically. If available, extra clothing is used to cover the legs, which are generally drawn up and hugged close to the body.

And if you think this scary movie armor is only worn at home, think again. I take a hoodie and a scarf with me to scary movies in the movie theater.

A friend of C's does NOT like scary movies. We will call him Joe. So Joe's wife convinces him to go see a movie, and at the time it was "The Ring." Joe was all kinds of unhappy. But he made a funny. Because when the commentary went around that the Japanese version was "much more scary" than the American one, he said: "Why? How? What, do you actually DIE after watching that one?"

7 comments:

Al said...

Hey kiddo -
Not into scary movies either. Just the words "Excorcist" sends a shiver up my spine.

ZooooM said...

See Al? You are smart. You recognize the fact that well, you just don't like them.

I am utterly fascinated with crazy woo woo stuff, but I have to wrap myself up like a human burrito just to get through it.

My ex had a friend over to our house once, and she told us a bunch of stories about ghosts. Me being a spoge of lameness, soaked it up and asked to sleep with the light on for two nights after that.

Al said...

well smart is a stretch
2 things - I swear my gradparents house was haunted. When I was like 8, I was sleeping when a wierd nose woke me up. The room in was an uncle of mine who died when he was very young from some kind of fever. When I opened my eyes, I noticed the window shade slowly closing till it got to the bottom, then snap up, then slowly close again. It did it like 10 times. The house was very old. Also when I was 16, I went to visit my cousin at college, I enjoyed some ummm recreational Chemicals then we all watched The Excorsist - My cousin's girlfriend said I didn't blink for 2 days.

Al said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Ryan said...

I have zero problemo admitting the first time - and maybe the second time - I saw "The Blair Witch Project", I was scared shitless. Part of this probably came from the fact that I was living in the middle of the forest at the time, and I was using surround sound. The part where you can hear the kids playing in the background? Freeky!!!

ZooooM said...

AL!! Holy crap!! I love stories like that, but I also know that if I had any of my own, I'd NEVER sleep with a light off. ever.

I should read your blog better, but have you posted on those stories? So totally interesting.

HI RYAN! You are a friend of Brandy's! Aren't you the same Ryan she is supposed to be dating?

I was more terrified of the hype of Blair Witch - by the time I got to the actual film, it was impossible for it to live up to the standard. But, had I stumbled on it and lived in a forest area, it would have had me freaked out too.

Rev. Brandy said...

I love your scary movie gear. Because I love me some scary movies! I don't have to dress for them, but I do have to have proper lighting and my ankles have to be unavailable for grabbing. If a movie is really creeping me out, I always have the weirdest sensation and fear that someone or someTHING is going to grab my ankle. So I curl my feet up or cover my legs or something thinking that will keep them grab-less. If a friend (not really a friend, if they ever did this for real) really wanted to scare the shit RIGHT out of me, they would go to a frightening movie with me, excuse themselves to go to the bathroom and sneak into the row behind me on the way back, reach under my seat and grab my ankle. I would scream to wake the dead.