Thursday, June 23, 2005

How Can Someone So Sensitive ...


CrazyChickenFootHat
Originally uploaded by ivegotzooms.

...be so clueless? And when I use the word sensitive to describe myself, I mean in the "strange people can't talk to me because I'll make a jackass of myself and they don't know/understand/love me despite that fact...yet..."

So don't you think that when I'm out in public I'd take a whole lot of preventative measures? Like, oh say....

When I'm at El Pollo Loco with C and the napkins I've put on my lap just magically disappear...do you think I'd look around to see where they went?

No, apparently not. Instead I'll just get another one out of the dispenser and keep going as if napkin disintigration is all kinds of normal. Then I'll get up to refill my drink and this strange lady with friends will say ...

"HEY! NICE SHOES!"

Which is exactly what happened tonight.

Thinking she was actually making a strange, but genuine comment I pretty much said thanks in my meek little voice and continued my scurry to the soda dispenser. But then I looked down and saw that my missing napkin had actually lodged itself into the top of my flip flop and I was dragging it around the restaurant!! Wait. I suppose it was more of a pushing it around that I was doing since the napkin was jutting out like a giant idiot tag, not on the side or in the back of my shoe.

Don't you think I'd notice these things before someone has to point them out? Am I that excited about a soda refill? Or is this a symptom of the same malady that causes me to lose a slipper willy nilly and not notice until 10 minutes later?

So then strange lady follows up with a "HEY, WELL AT LEAST IT WAS JUST A NAPKIN!"

Yeah, thanks a pantload for that.

I brought a stunt napkin home so that I could make this here photo re-creation of the event. The original, sadly, was swept into a trash bin.

3 comments:

Kathy said...

And see...I looked at the picture and thought..."CUTE SHOES...I wonder where she got them?" And then I looked again and thought..."Wow...great color on her toes." Because you see....the napkin hanging off the top of the shoe, didn't even occur to me as being abnormal.

So does that make me insensitive?

Rev. Brandy said...

"like a giant idiot tag"

Oh, Z., if I were to try to share a comparable story to ease your post-napkin-incident trauma, I am afraid I would elevate myself to extraordinary levels of similar insensitivity, make this story look mildly embarassing by comparison and certainly alienate all my new friends. Suffice to say the stories involve toilet paper and/or those toilet seat covers. No kidding.

ZooooM said...

Kathy and Rev, you guys crack me up. Perhaps we've all just been forced to realize we are genetically prone to accept objects attaching and/or flinging themselves off of our feet at any given moment? I'm going with that one.

No worries ever, Rev. You and Kathy here have become peps that can say anything to me and I'm still going to come back.

Shoes from Target, about 2 years ago.

I picked the polish because of the name "Kitten has Claws." I think it's made by Creative. I'm such a sucker for marketing of any kind. Well, except for those coffee cards.